


a moment's silence (when my baby puts the mouth on me)

by goldengrahams



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Accidental Self-Injury, Caleb has self worth issues but he's working on it, Chronic Illness, Chronic Pain, Domestic Fluff, Essek Thelyss Has Chronic Pain, M/M, Morning Cuddles, Nipple Play, Oral Sex, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Praise Kink, Strap-Ons, Tender Sex, Trans Caleb Widogast, Trans Essek Thelyss, Trans Male Character, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex, discussions of iffy past relationships, drow have fangs right? or am i just horny, i have fibromyalgia and so does Essek Thelyss, lemme know if AO3 fucks up the format, no beta we die like men, nothing too bad just a little sad tbh, trans author
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-14
Updated: 2020-02-14
Packaged: 2021-02-19 12:48:16
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,782
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22711060
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/goldengrahams/pseuds/goldengrahams
Summary: Essek realizes that Caleb has a habit of silencing himself during sex to the point of self-injury and decides something needs to be done about that. They work things out and tender sex ensues.Tender Shadowgast with trans!Caleb and trans!Essek. Because I'm trans and touch-starved and I said so.
Relationships: Essek Thelyss/Caleb Widogast
Comments: 19
Kudos: 211





	a moment's silence (when my baby puts the mouth on me)

**Author's Note:**

> Caleb and Essek are both trans men in this fic. I am a trans man myself. I use more masculine-coded words when talking about Caleb's junk but I tend to use more feminine-coded language for Essek (in part because I HC Essek as nonbinary but also bc it was just something I did). 
> 
> The toy Caleb picks is probably the Fuze Velvet (https://www.early2bed.com/fuze-happy-valley-velvet.html), and while I don't have a specific harness in mind they probably have a leather one if only because it's D&D universe.
> 
> Oh also in case it wasn't clear enough, Corellon's Blessing is essentially fantasy HRT potion because I want realistic trans characters in D&D dammit. Caleb has been on it for years, Essek has never taken it. Neither have had any sort of surgery, though they both bind (it's not mentioned in this fic though).
> 
> As for warnings, it's in the tags but regardless: there is a brief moment of unintentional self-injury as well as some discussions of previous and somewhat iffy relationships, mentions of body dysphoria and self-worth issues.

Essek exhales lightly as he pulls back for a moment, studying his work. Caleb is breathless, flushed and sweaty, his chest heaving. They haven’t been at it long, and it’s a lazy sort of thing; both of them had the day off and had woken up about a half hour ago, but neither are committed enough yet to fish through Essek’s wardrobe for the harness and cock. There’s a quiet rain outside that taps against the window, interspersed with the occasional subdued clap of thunder, but Essek is much more interested in the warm human squirming underneath him.

“Essek,” Caleb gasps quietly, “ _ oh _ , I--  _ bitte  _ \-- please don’t stop.” Essek smiles and places a quick kiss to each of Caleb’s freckled thighs before spreading them and dipping his head back down, diving his tongue between Caleb’s folds with enthusiasm. He hums in approval at the way Caleb’s hips buck slightly. Caleb gasps and gives a choked-off moan and Essek glances up in time to watch Caleb bite into the side of his fist to muffle his own noises. He frowns, but heeds the previous request, licking and sucking eagerly at Caleb’s modest cock. He’s still amazed by what Corellon’s Blessing was able to do for Caleb in that department. He certainly wouldn’t be called well-endowed by average standards, but it’s still an impressive and handsome thing when erect, and Essek rather likes that he can take the whole thing in his mouth without choking. There are times, if only because of Caleb’s body, that Essek considers taking the Blessing himself, but he knows it’s a big decision, and not one that matters enough to him to make. Essek stops only a moment to regather his bearings, nipping lightly at the soft skin of Caleb’s thighs and swiping his thumb along the damp curls around Caleb’s entrance. Caleb lets out a breathy noise and clumsily strokes Essek’s hair, and Essek tilts his head to kiss Caleb’s palm before refocusing. He flexes his tongue to a point as he takes Caleb’s cock in his mouth and sucks. He feels thighs tense against the sides of his head, making his ears twitch, and he can tell Caleb is close again. He swirls his tongue around the head, and as Caleb makes a muffled sound, he comes against Essek’s mouth, thighs shaking and ankles flexing against Essek’s lower back. Essek eases him through it with broad gentle strokes until Caleb begins to squirm with overstimulation.

Essek kisses Caleb’s thighs a few more times, then pulls away, pleased with his work. He is a bit discouraged to notice that Caleb’s lower lip is raw and swollen and the side of his hand is red and indented with small bite marks. Caleb doesn’t seem to notice, his arm thrown back against the pillow and a blissed-out expression on his face. He pulls Essek in and kisses him languidly, and they stay like that a few minutes in the soft warmth of their morning bed. 

“Not a bad way to spend the morning,” Caleb says as they break, giving that endearing little grin that crinkles his eyes. Essek adores that smile; he leans in a few inches and kisses Caleb on the mouth once more, right in the middle of that lovely smile. Caleb laughs softly and curls his arms a little tighter around Essek. He gives Essek a considering look and one of his hands dips beneath the blankets and into Essek’s smallclothes, still keeping eye contact. Essek nods in assent and sighs happily, leaning his head against Caleb’s shoulder. He’s still wet even though it’s been a few minutes now and Caleb gives him a knowing look. “Can I do something about this for you?” Caleb asks, indicating Essek’s arousal with a gentle sweep of his fingers across the dampness at the crux of his thighs. 

“Mmm… yes,” he murmurs. Caleb kisses along his jaw and neck, morning stubble scraping slightly against his skin, and Essek feels the heat rekindling in his belly. He catches another glimpse of Caleb’s free hand, still red and healing from the assault his own teeth, and his arousal cools, replaced with worry. “But I would like to talk about something first,” he blurts. He feels Caleb freeze against him immediately and he rushes to elaborate as Caleb pulls back shakily, his expression resigned and afraid. “It is nothing bad, I promise, I just want to check in with you about something.” Now Caleb just looks confused, but Essek will take that over the cold terror he’d seen moments before. He knows some of Caleb’s past, but he’s sure he couldn’t even fathom what put that kind of fear there in the first place. 

He lays back against the pillows, adjusting his legs with a small wince at the twinge in his hip, and invites Caleb to follow. Caleb moves a little stiffly, but after a moment he settles against Essek’s chest and Essek strokes his hair for a minute before speaking.

“I have noticed that you try quite hard to… stifle your noises during sex. For a while I was sure that you were not enjoying things, but I would like to think there are other things that disprove that.” Caleb relaxes slightly and nods, idly drawing patterns against Essek’s rib with his finger, but says nothing. “Then I thought maybe you just were someone who did not make a lot of noise-- because there are definitely people like that-- but you are not. You… you make noise, at least as far as I’ve noticed, you just muffle it, try to silence yourself. Were we in the Xhorhaus, I might understand that instinct, but we are in my towers and there is no one but me to hear you. You needn’t tell me if there is a reason for it, my only question is whether that is something I can help you with. I would not be saying anything except you almost gnawed your hand bloody and that… worries me.” He can feel the movement against his chest as Caleb swallows, seemingly thinking it over.

“ _ Ja _ ,” he says, his voice a little rougher than before. “I, um, I suppose I have not had many experiences other than with you, but the ones I did have prioritized secrecy and seclusion over anything else so it has sort of become… habit.”

“I have not had,” Essek huffs out a little laugh, “any experiences other than with you, so I am not sure what to expect. I just know that I do not want you hurting yourself. So is there a way I can help you work on it?” He feels Caleb swallow again, and then a shift as he tucks his head more into the crook of Essek’s neck.

“I believe so. I expect it would be as easy as saying something when you notice me doing it to get me to stop, like Fjord and his tusks. It is like breaking any sort of bad habit.”

“That makes sense,” he says, “if you are willing to try it.” Caleb cracks a somewhat cheeky half-grin, Essek’s other favorite of his smiles.

“In all sincerity, I really do appreciate that, but considering I would love to get back to things... I am willing to try nearly anything with you,  _ schön _ .” Essek beams and tilts down to kiss him, starting deep and slow and growing into something more passionate as Caleb licks into his mouth, deliberate and determined. They continue for a few minutes, trading kisses and soft noises into the space between them until Caleb’s hand slowly finds its way back into Essek’s underclothes. Essek giggles against his lips.

“Impatient?”

“Mmm. Something like that,” Caleb murmurs, moving his kisses down to Essek’s jaw, then his neck. Essek shivers slightly, moving his hands to a steady place on Caleb’s shoulder blades. Caleb kisses and nips up the column of Essek’s neck, to the soft, sensitive skin behind Essek’s ear. Essek moans, one hand moving almost instinctively to clutch at the back of Caleb’s neck and Caleb huffs out a chuckle. He’s not sure if elf ears are more sensitive in general or if it’s particular to Essek, all he knows is that kissing there always gets him very lovely reactions, so there he stays. It’s a few minutes of kissing and biting Essek’s neck, earlobes, and the long curve of his ear before Essek begins to gently swat at Caleb’s back and whine.

“You are the worst tease in the world,” he mumbles, “you have had your hand down my pants for nearly ten minutes now and you have done  _ nothing _ with it.” Caleb laughs, delighted and only slightly teasing.

“ _ Ja _ , okay, okay,” he concedes, “how do you want it?” Essek sighs loudly.

“ _ Luxon _ , Caleb, if you keep not touching me I am going to cry.” Caleb smiles fondly.

“Then answer the question.”

“Caleb Widogast,  _ please  _ put your fingers in me before I lose my mind,” Essek says. He pulls Caleb down so they’re chest-to-chest and kisses him while he feels Caleb’s hand moving, now with more intent.

“All you had to do was ask,” Caleb says, pulling back from the kiss with a breathless chuckle, “do you need slick?” Essek shakes his head.

“No, no, I am fine, just put them in before I have to beg you.”

“Mmm, but you do sound lovely when you beg.” Caleb punctuates this point with a kiss to Essek’s nipple, and Essek bucks his hips slightly at the stimulation  
“ _Caleb_.”

“Only teasing,  _ liebling _ .” And finally, blessedly, Caleb presses a finger in. He may not be much more experienced than Essek himself, but he knows what Essek likes, and it only takes a moment of searching for him to find that spot inside that makes Essek gasp and grip his shoulders. He feels Caleb pressing his finger against that spot for a while before he carefully slides in another, and Essek keens, rocking his hips down against Caleb’s hand. Once Caleb finds a rhythm with his hand, his head dips back down to kiss and mouth at Essek’s chest again. Essek groans lowly; somehow Caleb always looks so good in that position. He kisses Essek’s nipple, then sucks, cupping the round swell of his chest with his free hand. He alternates between each dark nipple, broad strokes and point-precision, occasionally fitting his mouth around one or the other and sucking with fervor and intensity. All the while his fingers twist and press inside, and Essek dimly realizes that at some point Caleb added a third finger.

“ _ Caleb _ ,” Essek rasps, and he’s surprised to realize he’s close to coming already, “Caleb,  _ mirshann _ , please.”

“I have you,  _ liebling _ , you look so lovely,” Caleb murmurs between kisses to Essek’s chest. “Are you close?”

“Ye-yes, please,  _ gods _ ,” he dissolves into a litany of mumbles in Common and Undercommon as Caleb finds a particularly good angle. 

For a moment he’s sure he’s going to be on the edge for a while longer and then he feels soft breath ghosting over his clit and that’s all the warning he gets before Caleb is sucking it into his mouth. Maybe he should be embarrassed by how quickly he comes from that, but there isn’t a thought in his mind about that as he shakes apart under Caleb’s dutiful mouth and hands. He can’t hear the sounds he makes over the blood rushing in his ears but as he comes down he realizes he’s panting and Caleb is sitting up, looking at him. He seems sheepish at being caught staring, but for one brief moment Essek had seen all the awe and love there instead and it makes something warm and sweet bloom in his chest. He tries to sit up to kiss Caleb but winces immediately at the twinge of pain in his hips and lays back down. Caleb notices and dips down to kiss him instead.

“Bad day today?” He asks, concern wrinkling his brow. Essek shakes his head.

“No worse than any typical day, this is just a bad angle to sit up from.”

“I can help you then,  _ ja _ ?”

“Please.” He directs one of Caleb’s hands under his hip and the other under his shoulder, and with Caleb’s assistance he carefully sits up. There is still that momentary twinge of pain, but it fades quickly once he’s managed to sit up and he sighs quietly, leaning his head on Caleb’s shoulder. “Mmm. That was very nice.” Caleb gives an airy laugh and kisses his shoulder.

“I aim to please.”

“You succeed in doing so every time,” Essek says with a smirk, angling his head to kiss Caleb on the lips, just a soft peck before he leans back onto Caleb’s shoulder. “Do you want to try what we discussed?” Caleb flushes.

“Another round, and you’ll let me know if I’m-- ah-- injuring myself to stay quiet?” He asks for confirmation. Essek nods. 

“We can do it another day if you do not want to today.” Caleb shakes his head.

“I know, but I  _ do  _ want to.”

“Then you have a few options for what we can do,” he says, kissing Caleb’s freckled shoulder idly between sentences. “I can suck you off again, or finger you. Or we can go through the wardrobe and I can fuck you properly.” He hears and feels Caleb’s intake of breath as the muscle of his shoulder twitches under Essek’s mouth. 

“That one, I-- if you’re feeling okay enough, I would love you to fuck me.” Essek chuckles.

“I wouldn’t have offered it if I didn’t feel okay enough, love. Would you mind finding everything though? I think you put it away last, anyway.” Caleb nods, stealing a quick kiss before he rolls off the bed to rummage through the wardrobe. Essek watches him as he does so, admiring the smooth planes of his back and the taught muscle of his legs. He isn’t muscular by any means, not like some of his friends, but there’s certainly some lovely tone to his arms and legs that he’s gained while fighting. His back and shoulders are dotted with more of those lovely freckles that Essek loves so dearly. Sometimes when he’s finished his trance and Caleb is still asleep beside him, he tries to count them, but he never gets very far before he decides there’s far too many of them to count, and simply admires them instead. Caleb hunts through the wardrobe for a short time before he comes upon the harness and the lubricant and sets them aside, and then for a moment he sits there, staring.

“Having trouble finding something?” Essek asks, propping himself on his elbows to continue watching.

“Trying to decide what size I want,” Caleb says, peeking at Essek coyly over his shoulder. 

“We both know which one you will end up picking,” Essek says teasingly. “You have a clear favorite.” 

He’s pleased when Caleb turns around and proves him right; the cock he’s chosen is definitely Caleb’s favorite to take, but it’s his favorite to wear as well. It’s simple and not too big, firm but still with a little give, and the material is soft and smooth to the touch. It’s also a shade of purple-grey similar enough to Essek’s own skin tone that it feels, if only emotionally, like an extension of his body when he wears it. He imagines that’s part of what makes Caleb like it, as well.

“Am I that predictable?” Caleb asks, seeing Essek’s expression at the chosen toy.

“Maybe a little, but there’s nothing wrong with that. Sometimes it’s nice to be predictable. Would you help me up so I can put that on?” Caleb nods, placing his armful on the bed and immediately offering his hands and arms to be directed as Essek needs. Essek eases himself up and is pleased to find that with Caleb’s help he avoids the pain of the motion altogether. 

He kisses Caleb once more before Caleb settles back onto the bed and gets to work buckling the harness around his hips. “Do you want me to prep you or would you rather do it yourself?” Essek asks, and he sees the small war that starts on Caleb’s face with that question. Caleb struggles with feeling like a burden, even during sex, and Essek knows that part of him would much rather do it himself, even if the rest of him would prefer the former option. “Perhaps a simpler question first: front hole or no?” Caleb seems relieved at not having to decide on the first question yet and considers this question for only a short time before making up his mind.

“Front is fine,” he says, and then, more quietly and with only a little hesitation, “and I would… love for you to prep me… if you are still offering.” Essek smiles broadly and nods.

“You’re making progress,” he says, “that’s very good.” Caleb practically glows with the praise, small as it is, and Essek feels as though his heart could burst with how much he loves him. “And I am loathe to point this out, but ‘fine’ is not ‘good’. I may have worded myself as though I had a preference, but that was without intention. What would  _ you  _ prefer?” Caleb’s face, if possible, turns a deeper shade of vermillion.

“Front is  _ good _ ,” he corrects quietly, “I would prefer that, right now at least. Just-- ah-- avoid my chest today?”

“Perfect. I only wanted to make sure of the former, and the latter is good to know.” He sees the gratitude on Caleb’s face and he aches, to think that someone ever gave this man reason to believe he was not worthy of love and care, to believe he should simply take what was given to him without having a say. “I love you, you know that, right?” Caleb blinks, surprised, and a smile curls up the corners of his mouth.

“ _ Ja _ ,” he says hoarsely, “and I love you as well.” Essek leans in to kiss him as he manages to buckle the last strap of the harness on and does so a while, sweet and warm with Caleb’s prickly jaw cupped in his hands. They pull apart and he allows Caleb a few moments to fiddle with the straps to ensure they are tight enough, and once they’re deemed proper, he slips the cock into the opening at the front. He adjusts it with some care, making sure it presses against him correctly and is in no danger of slipping free. 

“Well then,” Essek says, grabbing the bottle of oil from the bed, “I think it’s time I ravished you properly. Would you rather I be gentle, or not so much?” He watches the full-body shiver that runs through Caleb at his words, and the way his cock twitches with interest. 

“I think that remains to be seen,” Caleb says, his pupils blown wide in his bright blue eyes and a heady flush high on his cheeks. “I’d prefer you be gentle for prep, but I think I’m in the mood for something… a little more rough, I suppose.”

“Mmm,” Essek hums thoughtfully as he uncorks the vial and slicks his fingers, “I’ll keep that in mind, but I also plan to act at your discretion. Though, I have my limits as well, of course.”

“Of course,” Caleb breathes. Essek leans down to kiss him as his forefinger probes carefully at Caleb’s entrance, moving in slow circles before pressing in. Caleb hisses, bowing his head back, and Essek takes the opportunity to kiss the pale column of his throat, mouthing at his pulse point and revelling in the soft noises that pulls from Caleb. His moans, though quiet, rumble through his throat and against Essek’s lips, and  _ gods _ that’s hot. He curls his finger carefully inside, making sure to add lubricant as needed since Caleb doesn’t get as wet as him anymore. As he slowly eases another finger into Caleb’s cunt he sees Caleb’s hand twitch upward, towards his mouth, but it stills almost instantly at the notice of his attentive gaze and he savors the pleasured sob that’s wrung out of Caleb as he curls his fingers inside him.

“Gorgeous,” Essek breathes as he catches Caleb’s eyes. Caleb colors impossibly redder and Essek laughs joyfully, kissing him. He presses his face into the hollow of Caleb’s throat as he introduces a third finger, kissing and mumbling idle worship into Caleb’s skin. Caleb’s hips rock against his hand and he alternates between breathless whimpers and soft sobs depending on the angle of Essek’s fingers. “So handsome,” Essek purrs as Caleb lets out a particularly lovely moan, “you lovely, brilliant man. I adore you,” he kisses Caleb’s bristled jaw and delights at the wail Caleb lets out as Essek’s thumb nudges his cock. 

“Es-Essek,  _ herzchen _ , please, I’m ready,  _ bitte _ , fuck me,” Caleb gasps, and who is Essek to deny such an enchanting man? 

“You feel prepared enough?”

“Just make sure you have used enough slick but yes,  _ götter _ , please Essek.” Essek chuckles indulgently, kissing Caleb’s dappled collarbone as he removes his fingers. Caleb seems to deflate at the sudden emptiness, groaning low in his chest. 

“Not to worry, you needn’t wait long, love,” he promises as he pours a generous amount of oil onto the cock jutting between his thighs. He’s careful to avoid the harness as much as possible, though he knows from experience that its cleanliness won’t last. Caleb whines needily beneath him and rolls his hips. He pins Caleb to the bed with one hand, not enough to truly hold him down but enough for the pretense that he could. Caleb’s hips jerk under his hand again. “Careful there,” he murmurs. “I know what you want, but you need to have just a bit more patience.” Caleb looks half-gone, his face a fetching rose hue and the blue of his eyes barely rings, engulfed by the black of his pupils. He nods and yields to the press of Essek’s hand. “There’s a good boy,” Essek coos, and begins his slow, slick slide into Caleb’s cunt. Caleb sobs loudly, but bless him, he tries hard to keep his hips still, even if Essek can feel the frenetic energy thrumming under his skin.

“Essek,” he whines, the name drawn out and reedy in his pleasure. He presses his palms flat against Essek’s shoulder blades, not pulling him in, just steadying himself. He gives a long exhale when Essek’s hips are flush with his. “ _ Ja _ , that’s good.” He murmurs, almost more to himself than Essek. Essek pulls out a bit and slides back in to the hilt, adjusting for a minute and finding a rhythm that works for them both. He fucks Caleb slow and deep, kissing him and swallowing the noises that escape him, heady with his ability to reduce the brilliant, whip-smart man he loves to a beautiful, moaning mess. “Ah-- Essek,  _ härter _ ,” Caleb gasps, “harder, please." Essek is eager to oblige, ever mindful to ensure the angle won’t worsen the ache in his hips. He finds a new rhythm, a little rougher and a little faster, still pinning Caleb’s hips to bed with one hand. 

“You always look so lovely like this, Caleb,” Essek remarks, lifting Caleb’s thigh with his free hand and giving a particularly deep thrust that has Caleb moaning noisily under him. “You know, I am  _ very  _ glad I said something to you. Of course I am interested in your well-being and want to ensure you do not hurt, but this particular situation has the added benefit that now,” he thrusts his hips sharply and Caleb gasps, “I get to hear every lovely,  _ heavenly  _ noise that you make just for me, completely uninhibited.” The praise seems to be getting to Caleb just as much as the cock inside him, his hips jerking upward with nearly every compliment. Caleb won’t admit he craves praise, would rather claim he doesn’t deserve it, that he is filthy and evil and undeserving of love and care, but Essek knows better on both accounts, and he uses every opportunity to express that. Caleb writhes beautifully underneath him, near incoherency. “Are you close?” Essek asks, pausing perhaps a few moments longer than necessary with the majority of the cock outside of Caleb. Caleb nods, sobbing.

“ _ Ja _ , _ ja _ , so close, Essek  _ please _ ,” he gasps, dissolving into Zemnian that Essek can assume, from context and tone, is mostly begging. 

“I know, I know. You’ve been so good for me,  _ d’anthe _ . Do you think you can come like this or do you need me to touch you?”

“May--maybe, but touch me anyway,  _ please _ , Essek.” He can barely refuse when Caleb begs so prettily. He keeps up the steady rhythm of his hips and angles so he can grasp Caleb’s cock between his fingers. Caleb keens at the sudden contact, his hips stuttering. “ _ Ja _ , that is-- oh! Ohhh,  _ Essek _ .” Essek rolls Caleb’s cock over his fingers, rubbing the head with his thumb and tugging it gently, and it only takes a little under a minute for Caleb’s hips to give one last valiant jerk before he’s nearly screaming, hands fumbling against Essek’s back and hips. Essek can’t truly feel Caleb’s walls pulsing around him, but he imagines it vividly enough from what he’s felt with his fingers before. That thought, combined with the ridges of the cock on Essek’s end and the image of Caleb coming undone so beautifully, makes Essek reach his own climax. He’s always come a little easily in his earnesty and inexperience, but this is the first time he’s ever come untouched, and it leaves him boneless and nearly collapsing onto Caleb. He forces strength into his limbs, removing the cock and unbuckling the harness, and deigns to wash them up now, knowing it will be a pain in the ass to do it later. 

He washes the cock thoroughly in his bathroom sink and wipes the harness down carefully, storing them in their usual spot as he comes back into the room. He brings a wet washcloth in his hand as well. Caleb is unmoving on the bed, though one eye cracks open when Essek approaches. 

“Hello handsome,” Essek says. Caleb makes an unintelligible noise in response. He leans over Caleb’s body, nudging his thighs apart to swipe the washcloth through the mess he finds there. Caleb squirms and whines in overstimulation. “I know, I just need to do it once more.”

Once he’s deemed both himself and Caleb clean enough, he tosses the washcloth back into the bathroom and returns to the bed. Caleb seems a bit more coherent, moving to accommodate Essek’s body beside him in the bed. Essek happily indulges, rolling into a position where he can barely feel the ache in his hips. He feels Caleb shift against him and then a hand moving down his abdomen.

“I do not think you are as ready for another round as you seem to think,” Essek teases.

“ _ Nein _ , it isn’t that, I have come twice and you only once,” Caleb insists, his hand moving downward with more purpose now. Essek catches his hand and shakes his head, bringing the hand to his lips and kissing Caleb’s palm. 

“I have come twice.” Caleb’s brow furrows with confusion.

“You have? But…?” The realization dawns and Essek feels his face heat. “Just from that?” Caleb asks. Essek is still embarrassed, but also pleased to note the hint of awe in his tone.

“In my defense, you make very lovely noises when you are being ravished.” He kisses Caleb’s palm again and then releases his hand, curling a little closer against Caleb’s warm body. 

“That was very nice,” Caleb says after a moment of comfortable silence. Essek nuzzles into his neck.

“I agree.”

“I had to pay a bit more attention to keeping myself from falling into my old habits, but once I corrected myself a few times it became a bit easier,” he sighs, “I cannot promise I will not need your help, but I think this is a habit that should be broken somewhat easily. At least, I hope it is.”

“I hope so as well,” Essek says, “for more reasons than one.” He feels rather than sees the smile that tugs Caleb’s jaw up, and he tilts his head to kiss the line of that handsome jaw. “This has been a  _ wonderful  _ day off so far,” he comments, “though I cannot see myself leaving this bed for at least another hour or so.” Caleb chuckles and kisses his temple, curling comfortably into the warmth of the drow halfway on top of him and allowing himself to doze just a bit.

“ _ Nein _ , nor can I.”

**Author's Note:**

> Translations for Zemnian/Undercommon:  
> Zemnian:  
> bitte - please  
> schön - lovely/beautiful  
> liebling - favorite/darling  
> herzchen - little heart  
> götter - gods
> 
> Undercommon:  
> mirshann - angel  
> d’anthe - dear
> 
> Kudos and comments very much appreciated!


End file.
